The family tree
Just by way of clarification, I thought I’d make a quick list of people who get a regular mention on this blog, because I do realise that my family (particularly) can be quite confusing to the casual bystander. This is not a list of people who are important to me, per se, it’s simply a list of people who have been mentioned on this blog.
So to begin with, obviously, there’s Mum, Dad and Sister, the ones I live with. Sister and I have a pointedly love-hate relationship. Since coming out to my parents, in March 2007, things have become easier at home in many ways: I feel so much freer. Since my coming out to her, not much has changed except for the fact that she no longer harps on about “the homosexuals” and their unreasonable demands.
Pop, Dad’s father, has been a regular character on this blog, especially since his passing, as I’ve been dealing with my grief. He was my hero.
Grandma and Grandpa are my Mum’s parents. They have four children: Aunt Agony, Mum, U1 and U2. In many ways we are the typical European immigrant family: always in each others’ pockets. As a child I thought all families were like this; it wasn’t until I was much older that I realized how unhealthy a setup we have so I’ve been trying to extricate myself slowly to a healthy distance. But I love them all dearly, despite their pissing me off on a fairly regular basis.
Rick is the son of Aunt Agony. Like his mother, he is abrasive and very difficult to be around. I don’t trust him. I feel deeply sorry for him, because I suspect he is deeply unhappy in his own skin.
For the sake of clarity, and because I was running out of pseudonyms, I named my two uncles U1 and U2 (think Bananas in Pyjamas), and their wives A1 and A2. U1 was married to Tía for 19 years, but he left her and their four children (Lala, Bee, Ade and Bin) for another woman, A1, with whom he now has a daughter, Zoe. Zoe is happiness and joy personified. U2, who is a complete enigma, is living with A2; together they have a son, my godson, Luke.
Although technically no longer my aunt, I still feel a special connection with Tía and find it difficult to reconcile the fact that U1 and A1 are now married, thus making A1 my aunt as well. I cannot relate to A1 as an aunt. When he left, I witnessed the devastation that was left behind and watched quietly as Tía and her children slowly grew into the people they are today. We all consider his leaving to be the best thin ever to happen to their family, despite the heartache it caused.
Lala and her boyfriend Cal have their own place, a couple of blocks from the beach, where I often stay during the holidays. They have two dogs that I have adopted as my own: Roxie and Olly. Lala and Cal are more like siblings than cousins. Bee, Ade (and his girlfriend Mary), and Bin (and her boyfriend Alex) complete The Beach Crew. We often hang out with Lala’s best friend, Amber and her husband Tom.
That leaves Kate and her son Lance, Liz, Calla and Amy, who are the state-of-mind family. Kate and Liz are like sisters, often bearing the brunt of my bad days when I can’t take it out on my “real” Sister.
That’s about it for now… I’m sure I’ve forgotten someone, so I’ll you in later if I have.
