Loaded

Today is the first day in six years that I haven’t taken an anti-depressant. It wasn’t nearly as scary as I thought it would be, but then I won’t be out of my system completely until Tuesday. On Wednesday I start atriptyline/Endep. That means, by all accounts, I will probably sleep all day Thursday since everyone I’ve spoken to who has taken that particular drug has slept for like 24 hours when they started. As long as that particular side-effect has gone by Christmas I will be happy.

And tonight I am loaded. I have taken so many drugs tonight (some would say too many) that I am really floating high on a cloud of chemically induced bliss. This would be fun if I was in high school and it wasn’t precipitated by pain. I never did any drugs in high school…the irony of that is not lost on me. The reason is that for the last few days my upper back and chest have been in terrible pain, like a rubber band has been tightly wound around me, to the point where my chest is V shaped.

Well that’s it for me. I’m off to sleep, the sleep of the innocent. Sweet dreams.