Spring cleaning

Today I cleaned.

There are many things that I do well, but maintaining a tidy bedroom is not one of them. So today, on pain of death and grounding (at my age!) from my mother, I cleaned.

I threw out 4 large garbage bag of shit -- metaphorical shit, I grant you, but shit nonetheless. The large garbage bags were not, however, of the heavy-duty variety and one of them split down the side spewing said shit all over the floor. Sadly, it could have been mistaken as part of the general decor. The split occurred because I used the non-heavy-duty bag to line my dirty clothes basket (one of the hole-y, plastic-y, hamper-y types) and chucked stuff into that. My reason for doing so was that the waste paper basket I usually use was getting full so quickly that I was changing the bag every 10 minutes and it was really starting to get on my nerves. So I lined the clothes hamper with the bag and filled it up to the top. When I tried to prise it free from the basket, pieces of shit that were jutting out at odd angles got caught in the holes of the hamper, causing tears. I gave a final hearty wrench on the bag and almost staggered backwards as the bag broke, in a spectacular shower of paper and other assorted debris, and I ended up with a chunk of black plastic in my hands.

I also changed my sheets. I don't remember when I last did it. That is a very telling fact, and one that terrifies me.

I wonder how much longer the current state my room is in will last? I'd give it a week. Tops.